The girls love looking at pictures of themselves from China. They each have their own photo book. They are randomly placed in their, out of any order (I'm a bit orderly- I would have insisted in chronological order). They were so excited- it was their book, their pictures, their memories and their project- I stepped aside and just let them go for it.
I found this picture in the yahoo group from their orphanage, along with many others of "them". I was so surprised to see them, I felt like I hit the jackpot.
In so many of the pics they are with random people. None of these ladies were their foster mom. You can see the top of a little boys head- he was just being adopted and the families were saying goodbye to him and meeting his new parents.
I started to realize how our two girls roamed around and popped up in places, no adult watching them, no one that cared.
Ellie had told us stories about people treating Emma badly. She was victimized a lot. As her Mom that makes me physically sick. I wish she had been home with us earlier. Anything to save her from that...
When Emma saw this picture she was not happy in the least. She just stared at it and made no comment at all. She had a look of concern on her face. Even Ellie was not happy.
I was thinking they would be thrilled to see themselves- they usually are but not this time.
I asked Emma if they were nice to her. She hung her head and shook it as if to say no. I went through every person in the picture and only once did she say yes.
It broke my heart...
She was abandoned at an age where she new what was going on and then not accepted by her new community. It makes me so sad.
Emma goes to the beat of a different drummer.
She was extremely challenging in China.
She tested us and tested us.
She was out of control and unable to process what was happening to her.
Emma new that she needed to behave if she was going to have a family. We had every one of our guides tell her... we had too, we were scared.
It did enter our mind that maybe we wouldn't be able to proceed.
I had an extensive conversation with another bloggy Mom that was there. The whole time leaning towards disruption. When we were done and we walked away I knew we were not going to do it.
We trusted that God would not give us more than we could handle when we left for China. I knew we needed to keep trusting him and give all of this a chance.
Once we walked in the door of our home... we had a different child.
A veil of peace came over her.
Emma still goes to the beat of a different drummer BUT Emma is delightful.
I am so thankful we did not give up then and there but instead clung to his promises and found comfort through HIM.
This is a little girl that loves to be loved!
She is incredible and I love her dearly. We love everything about her! She is making wonderful progress in everything!
Did I tell you she can pedal! Skip! Hug us! She is learning the alphabet and her numbers! She is amazing! She is such a precious gift from God!
I think she loves her life!
That makes my everyday!