Thursday, October 17, 2013

Mixed Emotions

This is an emotional time for all of us.
This is not what we had planned to do right now.

(The drive in!)

Sometimes my heart hurts and my head begins to spin.
It's hard to be strong for everyone when all I want to do is curl up and cry.
So much stuff to move,
over so many years...
We have so many memories at this home and this decision to move was made quickly.
It was obvious that they would soon find another reason to turn our world upside down.
It's been going on for 5 years and it just wasn't going to end.
We know this is what we have to do to protect our family and live joyously.
The joy and peace will come with time.

The move seems to be hardest on Emma. She has found new friends at school and even went to her first birthday party! She is happy and life was good for her. Now she sometimes cries at home and school. She doesn't want to move and by the look on her face she blames me.

We have already seen God move mountains for this to happen- we have no doubts. 

The new place is wonderful and we know that it was handpicked by God.
With time it will be the perfect home for our family but for now things are just very challenging.

Once we were able to get into the new place
hubby picked up coffee at the local coffee shop and we just happened to get a
"drive through difference"!
That's when the person ahead of you pays for your coffee!
It felt so good!
Such kindness in our little time of need...
surely the Lord sparked a kind person's heart and it resulted in a day brightener for us!

(the big backyard)

Others have been so helpful in getting things done and getting the new home ready.
It is a blessing to see everything come together.
With time this place will feel like home.
I look forward to that time.

This is NOT my favorite thing to do...
I would so rather be teaching the children school, reading to the little ones, reading with the bigger ones, snapping pictures of their cute moments, doing my daily laundry and just enjoying God's blessings!

BUT life has it's ups and down and we need to roll with it
and most importantly follow HIS lead!

(The welcoming committee! And yes, that is a donkey!)

Last night I closed my eyes and pretended-
everything was in it's place,
the boys were home, 
I/we were home sweet home
and all was well with the world!
It felt good!

THANK YOU for all of you wonderful purging, organizing  and moving tips! 
Wow, you guys are GOOD!!


kippi said...

Jean,change is usually not easy for any of us. Praying for you all.

Joy Altman said...

I'm sorry this is so hard, especially for Emma. Praying for you all. I know God has good things in store.

Kath said...

One day, one hour, one room, one box at a time. It is overwhelming, moving under the best of circumstances is difficult, emotionally and physically draining. Don't be too hard or expect too much from yourself or others. Use paper plates, get help, wear the same clothes twice etc. With time and love this new place will be home, soon enough memories will be the empty feeling and love will fill the quiet. Prayers and hugs as you undertakiing this difficult and consuming task.

Lori said...

Oh, sweet friend. I so feel for you! We have toyed with the idea of moving so many times...and my heart can barely handle the thought of leaving our home, which is FULL of memories. And the daunting thought of packing up after all these years, goodness, it's completely overwhelming to think about.

I am SO sorry that you are dealing with this, especially for the reasons you are having to do it. I truly hope and pray that you will get through it with MUCH grace and peace.


Hanna said...

I am so sorry that you feel sad about leaving your beautiful home. I agree with these comments above. Will pray for you all and that you will be happier at new place.

Tesseraemum said...

Praying for all of you.
Emma's struggle hits close to my heart. Olivia REALLY had a hard time when we moved a couple of years ago and recently we weighed the possibility of moving into my childhood home (which is down the st from our last house) it would mean being back in the same neighborhood and schools and she was the most vocal about staying out here in the country and continuing homeschooling. She has made lots of good friends and still sees the city friends she loves. It's not fun right now but she will probably be the one who finds her groove in the biggest way!

Wendy said...

Oh Jean, I am so very sorry for the pain you and your family are dealing with. I would love to reach right out and give you a huge hug. Please remember, as much as you loved your home, a house is just a is the love you have with your family that made that house a home. You will take these memories with you and your new home will be the place with many new memories...I hope all good. Don't feel too guilty about how Emma is feeling. We made a huge move last year and my son came home from his first day at the new school and totally blamed me for having to move. I am not going to hurt a lot. The next day he came home from school and was so excited about all the friends he made. He now loves his new school and has made many new, great friends. We love our new town and am so happy God led us here. Through the trials of life come the blessings. Take care and take care of yourself....make life as easy as possible in this crazy time. When we moved, we had had all of our stuff put in storage and when we finally bought a home (we did live in a hotel for a month or two. Would never suggest that) we unpacked our storage very slowly....we cleaned a room, fixed it how we wanted and then unpacked what would go in that room. It took a few months and did not feel so stressful for me. I would really suggest this.
Take care and hugs to you.

mom2joy said...

I don't know if I have ever commented before but I read your blog all the time. I have a 17 year old daughter from China who I adopted when she was 17 months. I'm single and a Lutheran pastor. We've moved to new cities 3 times and two of the cities required a second move. It was hard, but once our belongings were in the new house, it felt like home very quickly. Make sure you don't get any new furniture for awhile, and that you make things as similar to your present house as you are able. God's blessings as you endure these stressful times.

Carolyn (in Las Vegas)

Stacy said...

Thinking of you all and PRAYING for you!

Vicky said...

Bless you Jean! I hope the new place has a fabulous fireplace for your family photos! My heartaches for you as you transition to this new home.

I so understand not liking the process! I pray that God will comfort your heart and renew your joy as you trust Him during this time of change.

I especially pray that God will comfort Emma!

"Are These Kids All Yours?" said...


Not that you have to move, because that is the opposite of love!!! :(

I am going to go through all those purging tips though, because we too are moving! Not because of our neighbors who hate us as well- not nearly to the extent shown to you :(. But because Michael needs a one level home where he can move around! Use his new wheelchair he is getting next week, and his walker he has been working with. Sooo......we are moving as well......

Praying both of us can keep our sanity!!! ;)

likeschocolate said...

So sorry you have to move and go through all this stess and not to sound contrite, but it is said that when God closes one door he opens another. While at the moment you can't see the blessings ahead they are their waiting for you to discover them. Hope the move goes smoothly!

Angie said...

Remember this: Romans 8:28
28 And we know that all things work together for good to those who love God, to those who are the called according to His purpose.
Even the bad things others have tried to do to us. HE is moving you on for HIS reasons and purposes no one is forcing you to do this it is HIS plan and all I see in the photos of the road the back yard is peace and tranquility. I know ALL of you, each child, each adult, all who come to visit, even though there will be a house full, it will be peaceful.

Rosemary Snyder said...

Remember, all things are held together by Him. Everything from the universe to the details of the move to the emotions of Emma's heart. Lean in to Him and He will continue to walk before and with you. Love,

~Monica Utt~ Itty Bitty Land said...

I was raised in the service. We moved every couple of years. I attended 12 different schools! From experience I can tell you that it was always sad to move and never felt like "home" right away. It always took me about a year before it REALLY felt like home. Saying, "Bye" to friends was always hard, but once I got older, I never lost a friend because of moving, but I always gained one at our new home. That's the great thing about love, there is always room for more. So although I was always sad to move, I was always excited to move. Excited to see who and what God had waiting for me at our new home. God bless.

Eileen said...

I can't even imagine moving so quickly. You are so brave! It takes a while for a home to feel like "home", but each day will get easier! It looks like a beautiful place.